Just*



When I fall down and try to get up,
I ask my mother, why did I fall?
Mother pulls me up and holds my hand,
I am left unanswered for time and again.
When I lose the metro ticket while on my way to college, I ask the guard,
Brother I lost my ticket, can I get another?
He shouts at top of the voice,
Showing the ticket counter I forgot it’s still there.
When I see a child smiling, I look at it
And smile back thinking of my days just like her,
But why did I grow up in the first place?
It was so nice being a child in a mothers arm!
When I fail at class tests even if I studied last minutes,
Tears roll down my eyes, I look at the number from time n again,
And try not to shout my pain like I do,
“ Why me God? Why me? Am I the only choice you got?
Am I the one that isn’t good enough for you? ”
When I wake up late and run for the college bus,
I wonder why did I not wake up 5 mins early?
Why is it always me?
When I stand in a queue and suddenly realize the store will close within a minute or two,
My stomach makes a horrible sound, which means I was supposed
To eat 2 hours back,
But I couldn’t, as eating while you are at your work is an offence,
But wait, Dying isn’t, right?
When I sleep but wake up in the middle of the night,
Wondering all the possible things I could do if I had enough money,
I lose my mind and dream again only to realize I am nothing but a failure.
Dying isn’t an offence.
I have a choice.
I might skip a breakfast and die instead.
Only when the morning alarm forgets to ring,
I realize it’s nothing but just a wild dream.
I am living a dual life,
While the life in my dream is better than the
Life I am breathing awake!
I am not poor, nor miserable; I am just a lost soul
Walking past the land for years unknown!
Death is surprising, death is mystery,
Yet death is pain for the dear ones loosing their beloved!
Why did God choose me out of everyone?
For enduring this suffering, this adventure called life?
I am sick of his game, I want to retire,
But I do not want to die it is not what I dreamt about,
While I was a kid in my mothers arm!
I want to live,
Just live, like none has ever done before.

......



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